Q & A with Nan and Self

Honesty is the best policy. Except when it isn't. So let's be honest first. No one emails me with probing questions about my life. I'm okay with that, except that I really want a Question and Answer page. So I sat down with myself like a hard-hitting journalist and asked myself some rather astute and provocative questions. Then I answered myself. Sometimes honestly. I found myself charming and articulate. I think I have a bit of a crush. I'm definitely going to friend myself on Facebook and invite myself over for wine and cheeses.

Questioning Self (Q): Your name isn't Nan. Do you think being anonymous makes you cool and mysterious? Who are you fooling, really? Explain.

Answering Self (A): I am a teacher. That means I'm a high profile public figure like Britney Spears or Alan Thicke. The media scrutiny is intense and exhausting. Anonymity is my burden.

Me, leaving the house for a gallon of milk

Q: Right. Okay. So explain your title, House of JARs.

A: I really wanted to come up with a clever concept with puns and/or alliterations, but everyone thought that Nan's Naughty Nook was a porn site. So I went with the jar thing. My life partner (or husband) and my firstborn son both have the initials JAR. Plus, I'm scared of plastic, so I have an impressive glass jar collection.

Q: What is the deeper layer of meaning (also known as the theme... thank you wikiwikikiwikipediaaaa!) in your blog?

A: Well, my blog really tackles the complex issues of balancing a professional career with motherhood, marriage and my bearded man crushes, and putting a puppet of my father in ironic settings. Sometimes I fancy myself a serious writer and attempt to describe maternal love or feelings of melancholy. Then I give up, drink heavily, and conduct extensive internet searches for images of cheese sculptures and Ray LaMontagne.

Q: Do you floss every day?

A: Of course! (Shifts in seat and slowly raises hand to mouth.) Who doesn't do that? How disgusting not to floss on a daily basis, right? Right?! (Looks to self for confirmation and approval.) Please like me! Please! Please!

Q: (Sigh.)