Original post date: January 21, 2014 (Moving my content from one blog to another. It just feels right.)
My constant access to Wi-Fi is making me insane -- a fact that we established with my last post. So instead of whining about it again, I'm going to do something about it.
I quit.
You hear me internet?! I quit!! (For 30 days, with stipulations and exceptions, because I'm not a complete caveman.)
Here's why:
1. I love to read. I was the kid that stayed up way too late squinting in front of her nightlight, trying to finish Little House on the Prairie before dawn. But since iPhone came into my life, I'm reading less and scrolling and tapping more. Unacceptable.
2. Facebook makes me feel weird. I'm too neurotic and too much of an overthinker for this stuff. Like, "Hey, I think we're friends in real life, but how come we're not virtual friends? We haven't asked each other yet, is there a reason for that? Maybe you have pictures of your cat that you don't want me to see? That's cool. I respect your privacy, but is it weird that we bump into each other via the comments section? Should I just click "add friend?" I don't know how to handle myself in this complicated social arena!!!!" (That said, there are some lovely people that I just love, love, love and facebook is our main vehicle for communication due to distance and/or busy lives. Tricky.)
3. My four-year-old pulls his "tricks" (you know, jumping up and down, going into downward facing dog and then waving one leg in the air, jumping off the back of the couch, etc.) out the "app store in his foot." This probably isn't a real problem but it does remind me of our vast generational gap, made larger by the time warp that is technology.
4. Pinterest. Oh Pinterest, you evil seductress with all of your life-enhancing possibilities. Crockpot meals for $2.00? How to get shiny hair in 5 minutes? The perfect sensory dough to occupy my child for hours of screen-free engagement? Yes please. Here's the problem. Pinterest also reminds me on a daily basis that:
a. My crafts always look mediocre. b. My cakes typically sink in the middle. c. My outfits are never that put together. d. Nothing in my house matches except the dirt.
So, my dear Pinterest. I will no longer let you set the bar for my perceived level of awesomeness. My cakes might look like crap, but they are so delicious. We need a break, because, at this point in my life, I feel better without you. (However, I would like to thank you for DIY lotion bars, DIY baby wipes, and Ritz crackers with Rolos melted inside. Life changing.)
5. Breastfeeding. I often find myself breastfeeding while balancing my iPhone on my sweet baby's head. Enough. That is simply enough.
So for 30 days I will quit facebook, pinterest, google searches (unless work-related), basically everything online, with the exception of:
-Email (because my boss wouldn't find my technology cleanse amusing)
-My articles (because they pay me, duh)
-This blog (because going tippity-tap at the keyboard soothes my soul)
It starts tonight. Goodbye internet.
